Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Use My Pain

Loving When It Hurts has reached its first milestone - this blog was created one year ago today, in fearful obedience to God's calling on my life to share my pain.

To set aside my pride.

To risk being gossiped about.

To be vulnerable.

And to tell the truth.

There had been too much darkness.

Too many lies.

For far too long.

It was time to share the ugly truth about my life.

One of the most important lessons that I have learned through writing my life as it happens is that consistent honesty and openness with others is powerful. By sharing my heart, through the pain and the joy, I have been held accountable for my choices.

No longer do I live in a place of fear and shame, where the darkness demands my silence.

Speaking out has allowed me to grow closer to God, to my husband, and to the many women I have met along the way.

Don't waste your pain; use it to help others.
Rick Warren

It seems like a crazy notion to some that our deep, personal pain could somehow help someone else.

I was so broken.

I had made a huge mess of my life.

I had done things I said I would never do.

I hurt people and destroyed friendships.

I had turned my back on God.

Anyone reading this right now can identify with at least one of those statements.  And because we all struggle with something, it just made sense that my story could provide someone with understanding and hope.

God uses our pain!

He takes the mess that we make of our lives and, if we let him, he will create a masterpiece.  He will remove the idols we cling to and shape us into something that reflects him.  This video is funny, creative and deeply moving; it speaks to this concept of allowing God to remove the ugliest parts of our souls.

So, I will continue writing my story, allowing God to chisel away the flaws that I create and make me into a masterpiece.  When you see me, or when you read my story, I want you to see God.  I want God to steal my show, as the TobyMac song states:

If you wanna steal my show
I'll sit back and watch you go
If you got somethin' to say
Go on and take it away
Need you to steal my show
Can't wait to watch you go
So take it away

My story is still being written.

I am still a masterpiece in the making.

I will continue forward, learning how to love when it hurts.
Thank you for walking through this life with me.  Your comments and emails have meant so much to me throughout this last year.  I cannot wait to see what God has in store for all of us in the year to come!


  1. Thank you for sharing your message. I really agree with you...being open and speaking up about our struggles truly becomes a blessing not just for us but for those around us. I love what you said: "No longer do I live in a place of fear and shame, where the darkness demands my silence." There is holy truth in those words. Thank you again for sharing

    1. The accountability it gives me has made the difference for me, I think...in keeping me focused on truth.

  2. Hi Jamie! I am coming over from Wisdom Wednesdays.

    Happy Anniversary! I guess I get a present, because I get to meet you today :) It is so wonderful to know that God uses everything, especially our pain to teach us about himself, and and how to live with him. I don't know what you've done in the past, but I know that God loves you like crazy, and will never give up or walk out.

    It is beautiful to hear you talk about growing closer to your husband and your blog-buddies. You know you are on the right track then! Good for you!
    So good to meet you today.

    1. Thank you! I'm so glad that God has shown himself over and over to me. Only took me 30 years to get it...

  3. Thank you Jamie for sharing this post last week at Wisdom Wednesday! It is amazing where God takes us through our pain, and looking back after a year, two or even five and being able to see all that He has accomplished in us. It is so humbling to me where God has brought me from where I was.

    This post was one of the top 3 clicked from last week, and will be shared tomorrow on my FB page and Twitter :) I hope you'll swing by and link up again! Blessings!

    1. Thanks Misty!!! Love participating in the link up with you.