Trust Without Borders

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Whereever you would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior

Over the weekend I made a decision, after talking to some wise sisters and a brother in Christ. After spending two hours minstering at a women's prison, I finally broke down before God and basically told him I was finally ready to hand over the reigns. I was ready to trust him. I was ready, no matter the outcome, the stop looking to my own strength to manage the pain. To stop waiting for it to get a little better before I give it to him. It was very freeing, as I knew it would be. And you know what?

He Bought Me Back

Late last night I wrote a blog post about refusing to quit. In that, I referenced a Jason Gray song called "Love's Not Done With You." One of my favorite lines in that song is this:

Everything's redeemable.
The God I know is capable.

EVERYTHING is redeemable.

That means that no matter how far gone you are, or how many mistakes you've made, no matter where you find yourself right now, the brokenness can be redeemed.

Refuse To Quit

At the chiropractor recently, I saw a poster on the wall. You know those motivational posters? The doctor I see there works with a lot of athletes and sports injuries. It is not uncommon for an athlete to be injured at some time throughout their athletic career. For some strange reason, I always used to think that athletes were immune to injury. Until I started seeing this doctor and I finally understood that they get injured just like everyone else does. Sometimes it's sudden, and other times it comes after years to pushing their bodies to the limit.

Being overweight for most of my adult life, I do not consider myself athletic. I hate to exercise and there isn't a sport that I just love to play. Unless eating bacon can qualify as a sport. Which it should.

Something To Celebrate

This summer, Kris and I will celebrate our 15th wedding anniversary. It's such an exciting benchmark in our relationship, in our lives. It fills me with joy when I think about what we have gone through, and how I am looking forward to celebrating this milestone with my husband.

Remember Your Calling

I feel like I have been failing in the ministry God has entrusted me with. I received an email today from someone who is hurting, because the marriage this couple began has faced trouble and been split apart by it. As I was reading through it, I felt the conviction of the Holy Spirit.

I've been a mess lately, to be honest. Emotional, moody, angry, sad. I go from one to the other, then back again. I know that I have not been an easy woman to live with. And those of you that know me are likely thinking, "Well, how is that different from usual?" Yeah yeah yeah, I know. But really, it's worse than usual. I've struggled to find joy. To look at all of the good in my life. It hasn't been long-lasting, and yet I feel as if there is something weighing down on me.